Its so quiet.

Yet another ungodly hour post. Everyone's asleep, and its all quiet. But its when the hubbub of the world dies down that the thoughts in my mind run amok and the projector in my head projects reflections of the past day's activities.

Can i say I'm happy? Can i say I'm sad?

I can only honestly say I enjoyed every moment when I was on stage singing. But watching my performance on youtube just now made every inch of my muscle cringe. My second song was much better than the first I must honestly say...

But watching Carrie sing "疼傻人" just made me wish everything had been a little different. I secretly admire and look on green in envy at her shine at every note in her very own song. A song so singaporean and so great, it would have been mighty amazing to be able to bring it over.

Carrie rocks la.

并肩作战的感觉会更棒，但我会努力，

你也别放弃，爱你，欣赏你，喜欢你，支持你的人很多！

So for now, let's just 期待 for Ah ken's shaving ceremony.

HEE HEE HEE.

Its so quiet. So, quiet. *ding ding* =P

Away! You bad thoughts!

Not totally out of my own dumps yet. Haha, but don't think leaving my blog on the last post helps with positivity.

SO here's some positrons in your faces!

*cue transformer sound effects.*



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变变变！...............

1. (\__/)
2. (='.'=)
3. (")_(")

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.....

Supplement it with a great source of love, joy and positrons!
Esther and the little lam'bs!

And ended they day with prawning at East Coast with Chooster and Carrie!
Where we spent an hour trying to catch........
ONE miserable prawn.

POSITRONS!!!!!!!!! ROLL-OUT!!!!!!

An open plea to God

Help. Me.

Reign Sovereign over all my decisions, over my emotions, over the words I speak, over the air I breathe, over the songs I sing.

Giving Up going to Josh's wedding in Sydney for this. The last I need, is an amplification of my doubts that this might not be worth the sacrifice, but really, who knows best?

Shine a lamp unto my feet and light up my path dear God.

Take away the throbbing hurt in my heart, the burden on my shoulders, and the load of my chest.

The people closest to me don't know what I'm going through, simply because I never know how to explain myself to them. But also because, every attempt at explanation always results in endless questions and belittlement.

I always believed all these trials and tribulations prepared me to be stronger for the worser things to come.

Why do i expect worse things to come when I should expect only the best?

If I had your support, nothing else would matter.

Feeling so lost.

My shepherd will find me.

He always does.

What is the greater purpose?

What's mine is not really mine.

I was given an interest in singing, and a knack for it.

Just as I start to allow it all to get to my head, I lose the knack for it.

Suddenly, I feel as though... I'm not cut out to do this.

Slap myself around with a fish and knock the senses back into me.

Ask and you shall be given, Seek and you shall find, Knock and the doors will be opened.

I'll have to keep trying, keep asking, keep seeking, keep knocking, keep pursuing.

That's why its called a journey.

I don't want to be an idol of any sort.

I want to be a role model.

I'm not perfect.

I love my imperfections and insecurities...

Because we all have them.

So we connect.

If i survive, then so can you.

As easily as I put these emotions into my blog, I wish I could put them into song.

Saw this on Mono's blog. So mono. I like. =)

Once More.

After close to 6 years, I made it back to Bible Camp...

Once more.

What a refreshing experience.

But as usual, I fall sick at bible camps. Or just camps in general...

I must have sneezed my nose silly I think the insides of my nostrils are worn out.

Haha, but like how pregnant people have cravings, it seems people down with "the-evil-make-you-sneeze-non-stop-but-is-not-H1N1-bug" also have cravings! Like how I'm gorging on Famous Amos no nut chocolate chip cookies!!! Its making me happy! Releasing endorphins that make me feel chirpy!

Well, its another 2 days before I get back from Camp, and guess what? Carrie's here too! She's at my bible camp! *beams* So its another 2 days before we get back to sunny island and head down for our interview at UFM with DJ Ken. =) Looking forward to it...

Because, after 2 years of graduating from Superstar School,

Here I am, all worried and excited about being in a competition...

Once More.

One Million Star PK competition.













































There were so many people there who blew me away with their voices, and I was so uncontrollably nervous. Even more nervous than when I went for Superstar Auditions. I don't know, maybe the 心态 was different. Now I come with a small history, and that history can either bring me further or bog me down.

I am so pleased, so thankful, so amazed and so glad to have been able to be a part of the top 20.

I am contented. But it doesn't mean that I don't want to win and go to Taiwan.

I want to. But I want to perform as a contented individual who knows that all I have to do is throw the ball as hard as I can, where it lands, whether into the net or not, is not up to me entirely. SO I'll just throw real hard. =)

Wee.

Thank you all for the constant encouragements, thank you Ivon and Daphne and Yuneng for giving me that push on the back and that nod of approval, saying "Go! Go join!" Otherwise, all this would ever have happened!

SO eggciting!

Oh yes!

Check out http://onemillionstar.starhub.com/index.html
for frequent updates and also to vote for me! heehee

查无此人

This song gave me the reason to join,
and is also the song I sang but almost killed my chances with.

"what song did you sing?"

"查无此人。”

“Huh?"


查无此人
作词:姚若龙作曲:陈小霞

寄一份问候给远方的童年
想念那张满是纯真的脸
可以哭过就笑从不曾算计
幸福离的多遥远

寄一份心情给久违的青春
想念那个敢爱敢恨的人
相信忠于感觉会快乐一些
宁可受伤不肯说谎言

查无此人他们说查无此人
童年只剩一张黑白的照片
提醒我在逃离保护以前
我有过一个简单
却又美好的世界

查无此人他们说查无此人
青春只剩一段未完的爱恋
偶而像被风卷起的黄叶
落在心口上像一滴
被忍住的泪


I forgot some lyrics here and there, and was more nervous than i had expected,
but I really wanted to sing this song to MYSELF more than to anyone else.
Tomorrow's another round. Similarly, I'll sing a song I really like.

Let's hope its good enough. =P

梦途

人因为梦而成长，因为梦而飞翔。

请赐寻梦人王建复翅膀！









Album : 梦途
Venue : Vivo City Amphitheatre, level 3 (outdoor)
Date : 130609 (Saturday)
Time : 8:30 p.m.


















Its his debut album, his debut autograph session.

His story: A young man pursuing his dreams arrived in Singapore and set up home here for 10 years, dabbling in different roles as an artiste, hosting, singing, acting, putting his heart into everyone. But the one thing he wanted was to sing, and today he has done it, never giving up on this dream even after 10 years. He is an inspiration to me, and for that I respect him.

Do come down and support Jeff today at Vivo, but even if you can't make it... No worries! Show your support by trotting down to a nearby Cd store to buy his album today!

Revive our local industry one person at a time.

Save the earth, one tree at a time.

Build our dreams, one baby step at a time. (yes I'm joining One million 星星 pk. heh heh heh.)

Support local singers, one album at a time!

Ok, i ran out of one ___ at a time.

Bye!!!

M.A.C not Mac.

I'm definitely not the make-up guru who experiments with loads of colours and a thousand and one different kinds of foundations and has 10 to 20 mascara sticks or eyeliners.

I'm no guru, but from when I first stepped into mediacorp and started having the weekly dosage of "skin coverage", I've had my fair share of pimples, clogged up pores and rashes.

But this brand of make-up has already established a sound reputation amongst industry professionals, artistes and make-up artistes alike and I am Supercalifragilistically eggcited to be sponsored by them!

Why? Because I love mac's colours! And it doesn't give me rashes! It feels light on my face! I don't feel like my face is struggling to breathe under cement! I love the colours!

shucks, did i say that already?

Like I said, I do really minimal makeup, and I really usually only go to public events with as minimal as possible, but my favourite part of the make-up process is blending colours onto my cheeks and actualy, entire face! I like that healthy glow that the mac colours I have now give me, like a freshly sun-baked healthy individual, healthy cheeks and all!

I think that make-up is more than just beautifying and covering up spots and freckles. Its supposed to bring out the good and cover the bad right? Well, for me, its also about enhancing who I want to be... Cheery and Healthy. Hoho.

They have extensive colour choice and i use three colours on my face. On my cheeks alone. Haha, can you imagine?

Its fun! Sometimes I imagine just using the colours on a piece of canvas instead of my face... they have so many colours! Maybe even more than the colours in my Faber-Castell colour pencil box...

If you have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about and still think I'm talking about my trusty MAC laptop instead of M.A.C.

Please visit http://www.maccosmetics.com/
to clear your head!

A picture I took onboard SQ879
on the way back home to Singapore...

Singing Praises and feeling tiny watching the wondrous skies
change hue and colour everynow and then like God was splashing colours
and blending them around to form new gradients...

M.A.C - Make-Up Art Cosmetics

Colours Galore !

Okie, I got 10 tickets for 综艺go live tomorrow.

Who wants???

I'll leave it at the recept counter, either Xueting, Jiaqi or Amanda will help me to distribute? =)

Thank you!

回到最初的那快乐

So many things at this junction of my life that I can be worrying about and crying foul over. My lack of emergency, my lack of talent, my lack of opportunities, my lack of money, my lack of success, my lack of sleep, my lack of exercise, my lack of freedom, my lack of... happiness?

Well, while we continually age, mature and move on in life, and time deals us different scenarios, different obstacles to overcome the root of happiness is in contentment which lasts all ages, through time, through space, through life.

Not such an easily grasped concept, I'm not a good example. Yet.

Contentment comes and goes, just as how happiness come and goes.

A good good old time(never change over the years) friend of mine asked me just now if I was happy doing what I was doing. If you guys don't know by now, it means pursuing a dream that has no guarantee, having no stable income, having no CPF, having no medical coverage(which means I better not fall sick).

I told her, yeah some days I'm happy some days I'm not. But I'm doing this because I like to do it and I only have now to try for. I don't want to live a life regretting not taking this wilful step.

Why some days happy only?

Cause somedays I'm contented telling myself I've tried my best, gone so far, had so many chances, met so many great people, learnt so much.

Other days I feel sucky, lazy, un-talented, old and useless and unhealthy.

Haha, anyone feel the same?

There are so many aspects of my life I need to get back on track and the more I don't do that, the more reasons there are for discontentment. I know the reasons for discontentment so why issit I don't get down to the root of the problem and solve it?

Well I'm gonna try.

I'm gonna try and go back to when I lived with a child-like faith, a child-like perseverance and a child-like fairytale belief that as long as I did my best, God would do the rest. =)

But first, I have to do my best.

I wish all of you Peace, Joy and Happiness!
(haha. To my fellow SCI mates who know what in the world I'm laughing about now. )



On a seperate note,

I didn't make it to NYGH homecoming 2009, but I did manage to catch up with a few peeps at KAP after the dinner. I feel like I'm stuck in JC and they've all moved on with their lives but its amazing and beautiful to watch these crazy girls I knew in secondary school move on to become beautiful women.

Some of them I don't know well at all. But I'm glad I got a chance to send “爱美丽” home. The short journey home was too short for a heart to heart talk. But I think it left me with alot of nostalgia and thoughts hanging in the air.

Maybe as we grow older, we rationalise too much. I've always been someone who followed my heart. It takes alot of concious effort for my brain to rationalise things. But it seems not being able to rationalise has left me blissfully ignorant of too many things. I guess I need to find a balance.

I'm a LIBRA-ian (couldn't figure out how to spell that correctly. It just ended up looking like librarian.)

I balance things.

Let's hope I do a good balance with my life. =)


Wishlist:
A bunch of fun-loving and like-minded, music-loving people who will gather at my house week after week churning out fun-loving songs. I need more than 3. For some reason, 人来风 diya only gets creative when there's more than 3 people around. The more the merrier actually. =)

A short one

Its been a good week, with lots to settle, lots to think about, lots of new people to meet.

Made some decisions, worried about some others, praying about most.

Just had a great steamboat dinner with the girls from school and one lovely "Aunty" who is no where near looking aunty. We call her aunty out of respect and affection.

its going to be another interesting week, starting with the SPH young reporters yearly singing competition and the NYGH alumni dinner. On monday.. Carrie, I and Daren(we reunite again!) will be on 综艺Go Live taking part in a segment similar to "Don't forget the lyrics"!

Its going to be tough cause we're going to challenged on OLD SONGS. yikes.

Lots more to blog about but I don't have the inspiration for them just yet... hmmm... been pretty down physically of late. Tired and it seems dangerously weak and prone to slight sore throats and flu and for the past 4 hours, I've been having this irritating Hiccup that won't go away.

So till I have more inspiration yeah.

Yeah.

Priorities and Decisions.

There's never a right or wrong in making these choices.
There's no way to figure out which would lead to the best scenario, and its always too late for you to regret lost time since lost time is lost and cannot be retrieved.
You move on and you make the best out of it instead of wasting more time lamenting what has been lost.

I just spent one precious hour being hooked watching 'House' instead of reading a book i recently bought in a bid to provide some fertilisers for my brain. The book proved to be less tasty than the hour long episode about the maverick doctor House who saves and enlightens dying patients in his own unique rebel way.

Nice.

Anyhow, I spent the past two days back from Taiwan sleeping alot because I haven't been feeling well and getting a little paranoid over the prospect of maybe having contracted H1N1. Thank goodness I'm ok now. Phew.

Its time to allocate the little time I have left of this 24 hour day to rest. Shut-eye rest.

GOODNIGHT!!!!!